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Quotable Lines
Minsk: Gorb. Dis iz turnink into vun of dose plans... Hyu know – de kind vere ve keel everybody dot notices dot ve's killin' people? Gorb: It is? Minsk: Uh huh. And how do dose alvays end? Gorb: De dirigible iz in flames, evryboddyz dead an' I've lost my hat. Minsk: Dot's right. Und any plan vere you lose you hat iz? Gorb: A bad plan? Minsk: RIGHT AGAIN! Othar: The boy is not stupid. A web of lies can unravel with the lightest touch of the truth! General Zog: You giff the order und ve go. Ve haff a team of Jägerkin, Lackya, clenks und crew at each entry. Klaus: Excellent. I'm pleased at the lack of rivalry. General Zog: Sir - dere iz a time to twit nancy-boy feetsmen und a time to crush bogs. Klaus: Oh no. Not this time. Not without an explanation. I was away for a few years and I came back to a world in ruins. Death, destruction, chaos--the endless fighting--it was like the Heterodyne Boys had never existed. Things were worse than ever. So I stopped it. And I did it my way this time. No more negotiating. No more promises. No more second chances. And I did it alone. Because I had to. And it worked. And now, here you are. Alive. I thought you were all dead and I didn't even know what had happened!. But now I will, because you will stay and tell me. Krosp: Like it or not, you'll cause trouble just by existing! Agatha: All right then. Let's go cause some trouble. ''Krosp'': He's in a tree! Maybe he's a bird! ''Agatha'': He's not a bird. Krosp:Squirrel! ... ''Balthazar'': Hit him again! ''Zeetha'': There is a serious flaw in this "perfect plan"--one that could ruin everything. You're not really dead. Now are you? Master Payne: Could you burn down people - women and children - even if you knew they had become monsters? Agatha: I... no... I don't know. Master Payne: The Baron can. The Baron has. I respect him for that, but I don't want to be him. No sane man would. Agatha/Lucrezia: I do so mistrust it when "impossible" is one's initial reaction to an idea. ''Lars'': ''She's a Heterodyne?! Dimo: Ho yez. Maxim: Sure. Oggie: Din' ve mention dot? Zeetha: I'm afraid so. Krosp: Glad you could join us, Lars. Sturvin: I didn't know. Kalikoff: Heh. You can look up her dress. Lars: You knew this?! Dimo: Ho yez. Maxim: Sure. Oggie: Back in Zum Zum! Zeetha: I just figured it out. Krosp: The grownups knew. Sturvin: I''' didn't know! Kalikoff: It's really out of focus--'' Lars: ''We--We have to '''help her. Dimo: Ho yez. Maxim: Sure. Oggie: Vot a goot boy! Zeetha: Now that's 'love!' Krosp: Well, I guess she's got brains enough for two. Sturvin: Isn't that what we're 'already doing?' Kalikoff: But if you squint up one eye... Lars: Anything else I should know? Dimo: I iz double-jointed! Maxim: I haff neffer luffed. Oggie: I iz going to be a great-great-'great'-''grandpapa.'' Zeetha: She likes you,'' too.'' Krosp: I'm 'hungry.' Sturvin: We should get off the roof. Kalikoff: It gets even more out of focus. '' Agatha: I'll think of it as a symbol of everything I've overcome - and of everything I will overcome. Carson: But I'm an old man, and I've lived here a long time. I've learned that just because something is "impossible" - doesn't mean it can't happen. Moloch: Oh, jeez! You're bleeding! What happened? Agatha: Let's just say that somewhere in this place there's a dial marked "High Drama," and it needs to be turned way down. Agatha: Hey, you kids! Stop hitting my house! Agatha: "Any sufficiently analyzed magic is indistinguishable from science!" Zeetha: What's with the quotation marks? Who said that? Agatha: ME! Violetta: You wanna make a bet on who she'll pick? Moloch: Sure! But hey--'' She's the Heterodyne. Maybe she'll just keep 'em both. Agatha: What is the ''matter with you two? Are you twelve?! Agatha: "Testing" is for when you're still guessing. --And, now, I have no need to guess. Gil: And I guess even you wouldn't want that to happen to Agatha. Tarvek: Well No. No, of course not! It shouldn't happen to... well, to anybody. Castle Heterodyne: Come on, you have to say it! Just like I told you! Agatha: Oh, all right... People of Mechanicsburg, the castle is mine! I am the Heterodyne! Castle: Go on, the whole thing! Agatha: sigh. Okay, okay! TREMBLE BEFORE ME! General Zog: Und de seventh, vell, he iz a tricky vun. He iz...de keeper ov many secret tings. Tarvek: You know, I'm not really much for the whole "school pride" thing-- but you clods aren't fit to shine a smoke knight's knives. Agatha: You look awful. Tarvek: ...You look beautiful. Agatha: What? Um...right. Sure. Because I always look stunning when I've been crawling around working on greasy old machinery and...and... Tarvek: That's right. Always. Agatha: ... but after that, I'd better see some cake. Tarvek: You know, there's more to being an evil despot than getting cake whenever you want it. Agatha: If that's what you think, then you're doing it wrong! Yglyn: Allow me to be the first of many to cringe for mercy. Agatha: ... Thank you. Yglyn: ... Well? Agatha: Oh. Of course. Tremble and obey. Yglyn: Hee hee! Tarvek: Ooh, ooh, say it to me! Agatha: No. You wouldn't do it anyway. ' Gkika: ''Surrender! Now!'' Klaus: Of course. Gkika: ... vot? Klaus: I have already achieved my purpose. I surrender ''unconditionally.'' ... Do you have any tea? ' Tweedle: "Oh, Martellus, why does every laboratory you design have so many shackles?" I swear, people ask the stupidest questions. green monster: GRAAAAH! Agatha: STOP! monster: GRAA? Agatha: I'' am ''NOT your creator! You were NOT created to serve me--'' and I do ''NOT expect you to obey my commands or crush my enemies! monster: GRAA-- ... snort around, goes back in lair Violetta: You are kidding me. Krosp: Finally one of you gets it right! Agatha: That was the worst breath I have ever smelled... Agatha: We've blown the fore starboard hog! anonymous Jäger: Hoy! General! Look vot ve found! Dimo: Vot der dumboozle? ... Agatha: I thought they never told you anything. Dimo: Dey tells me all de schtupid tings. Agatha: Because you're a general now? Dimo: Hy gots to be a general now. All de odder vuns iz in Mechanicsburg. ... So somebody gots to be de schmart guy. Garik(?) Steinvasser: You're her? The Lady Heterodyne? Wow. Can you do it? Can you free the town? Agatha: Um... Well, I am the Heterodyne. So I guess I've got to do it-- or die trying. anonymous Jäger: Zo, iz hyu gun try to kill me? Gil: Don't be ridiculous. Return to the wild, little friend. Run. Be free. ''Agatha'': Do you suppose anyone other than me actually likes Tarvek? ''Krosp'': I'' like him. He thinks like a ''cat! Gil: You said yourself this will be insanely dangerous-- So who better to try it on than someone dangerously insane? Castle Heterodyne: Ah, you're here for Captain Vole! Castle Heterodyne: There are... others who see time differently. When it is meddled with, they notice. ... Aaaaah! What is that?! Gil: You're supposed to tell me! Castle: Last time they were much smaller! There were dozens of them! There were more tentacles... and they had hats, and... and... Gil: Less hysteria, more analysis. Castle: Hem. Yes. Sorry. At its current rate of movement... perhaps two years. Bang: Why don't you just let him knock out a few of them-- so he's a little weaker? ... Gil: Um... I didn't think of that. That's... that's a good idea. ... Bang: Hah! I gloat! I have, with stunning simplicity, solved a problem Mister "I'm so clever" could not. Ha! ...aaand that's the last straw. Who are you, and what have you done with Gil? Bang: Uh...Do you know who I am? Zeetha: Captain Bangladesh Dupree--exiled pirate queen. You kill stuff for the Empire. --And you're pretty good at it, too. ... Bang: And you're Princess Zeetha. You hang around with this Heterodyne girl--and try to teach her to fight. ... Bang: --Hold on. turns That's really amazing--but whatever it is you're doing, knock it off. Violetta: Whoa. You could see me? Bang: No, and it was giving me a headache. Zeetha: Ha ha! Oh, you are going to be so much fun to fight! Lucrezia-in-Agatha: Klaus, darling-- Klaus-in-Gil: I am not listening to you. ... Lucrezia: We both want the same thing, you know. We both want peace. Is that so wrong? Klaus: You would enslave the minds of all Europa in pursuit of "peace"? Lucrezia: Well, dear, that does seem to be the only way we're likely to get it-- But I suppose I could try it your way. Violetta: Whoof--And I thought my family was bad. Colette: Your family is ''bad. ''Mine is noisy and embarrassing. Gil: So, Sturmvoraus-- I figure there's a pretty good chance that, between temporal shift trauma and Von Blitzengaard's poison-- any so-called "wits" you may once have had are more scrambled than ever. What do you think? Tarvek: Temporal shift? huff huff- Martellus took Agatha, hit me with his nullabist poison. This could be some kind of death hallucination, but since I'm seeing you and not Agatha, I call that unlikely--'' huff huff- ... Your face and voice show signs of a hyper-extended state of spark activity, which must have taken ''days to manifest-- indicating a typical disregard for your own person, as well as the people around you--'' huff huff- Therefore I am forced to accept that you are ''really here. How long has it been, and where is Agatha? Gil: Ha ha! You're fine! Tarvek: Ow! Gil: So, you're the duplicitous weasel--How'd I do? Be honest. Tarvek: What are these ugly suits we're wearing? Gil: What? It's the future. Everybody wears these. Tarvek: I knew it. It's the end times. Van: Is... Is that... the Lady Heterodyne? Tarvek: It is! It's Agatha! A colossal statue of Agatha! Bang: Oh, that's nothing! You should see the really big ones! ... Van: I like it! Tarvek: Me too! Gil: ...Really? Van: The tourists will love it! Tarvek: Agatha will hate it! Gil: What? Why? It's beautiful! Tarvek: Very true! I'm probably totally wrong! ... In fact, you should do more--'' in ''different poses! Bang: Ooh! Hey! I know this great trick--'' where you put a sleeping guy's head in a bucket of water-- Gil: No. In fact, he's ''your responsibility for now. Bang: What? Gil: You wanted to watch him. Now you can. You're his new bodyguard. Bang: Yeah, but now he's all boring! Gil: Keep him that way. anonymous Librarian: Oglavia-- I...I know that name... Oglavia: You do? Oh, but of course! You're a librarian! You've been peeking into the forbidden stacks, eh? Reading the dangerous books? Librarian: Forbidden--Wait! You...You're-- Oglavia: "Everybody Wants to Talk" --Extremis Press. A vanity project from my youth, I confess. Librarian: You're dead! They killed you! Oglavia: A few minutes are all I need, Herr Baron! Librarian: I'll talk! Oglavia: See? That took no time at all! Vole: Now hy dun know if hy feels like fightink enny more. Vierd, huh? Higgs: Eh. That'll pass. Generals fight. Pretty good at it, too. Vole: Vots dot gots to do vit-- Vait--Vot iz hyu saying? Higgs: Well, I'm saying you're talking like a general, Vole. ... Vole: But... But hy kent be a general! De masters vill neffer trust me! Hy haff done all kinds ov horrible tings! Higgs: Kid? We all did-- And then we grew up. Category:Lists